Seoul

Hello again from Seoul!

I spent a very cold day in Seoul with a friend, after a red eye from Bangkok and now am only about 10 hrs from home! Yay! Not much to report expect that I think I flew the scariest aircraft ever from Siem Reap. It was suppose to be a Bangkok Air flight, and it was, but in a Royal Bhutan Air Jet circa 1950. Seriously the smallest plane I've ever seen in my life, held only about 40 people and probably held together more by it carpet than anything else.

Ok here we go again. I hate long flights over oceans. See you all soon!

Culture Shock

So I've been trying to update from Siem Reap but the internet connection was horrible so I'm doing it from the airport as I'm waiting for my flight to Bangkok.

Siem Reap is a horrid little town, full of obnoxious Western tourists and not worth the time for the lack of charm it has. I've experienced a MAJOR culture shock coming from my lovely little Phnom Penh to Siem Reap. What happened to the beautiful Cambodia I've come to know and love?? Tourists, that's what.

I missed Sothear (guy that works at the desk), the moto drivers outside the guesthouse, the incredibly refreshing lack of tourists, the huge NGO community. Phnom Penh has nice people in it too, whereas Siem Reap is becoming so used to tourists that people are rude and aggressive. Both Cambodians and the tourists. While Phnom Penh is full of people working to change their society, Siem Reap is full of gargantuan sized blondies (deutch ja?) and aggressive little Japanese that try jocking for a place at the top of Angkor Wat and in process send people spiralling down three flights of ancient stairs. (Ok, no that didn't happen but it could've!) In short, I am rather disgusted by it.

Ok enough bitching about Siem Reap, its an ugly little tourist town that offers none of the charms that Phnom Penh has. So why have we come here? Simple, the temples. And despite all the trappings of this town, the temples are amazing.

We saw Angkor Wat at sunrise, along with nearly another 1000 other people, but it was amazing. These structures are impressive, and are about a thousand years old. They are incredibly well preserved, and the extensive restoration process has, if you'll allow a little mellow drama, brought out all their glory. The complex is huge, in fact its thought to be the largest religious building in the world. Climbing to the top of the structure, you can see all of the flat, open land out in front of you and the temples beyond it. I'll have to post pictures when I get home as its a difficult place to describe.

We visited all the major temples, Angkor Wat, Bayon, Ta Phrom, and various smaller unique temples a ways out of the main complex area. Its like an adults Disneyland. Climbing, exploring, simply put, gazing in awe at everything around you. The bas reliefs cover nearly every temple, all telling the particular story of whatever king built it in addition to religious stories and histories. Ta Phrom is undoubtedly one of my favorites (Tomb Raider temple). They have not completely resorted it and allowed the gigantic trees that have covered it to remain and so you see tentacles of roots everywhere, covering the structure in the most picturesque ways. In fact, its so amazing that this morning we returned since yesterday we had bad lighting.

So Siem Reap is worth it for the temples. I'll be posting photos when I get home, so stay tuned. (If anyone is actually reading this :-) )

I'm leaving for Bangkok and from there I have a red eye to Seoul. I'm super excited as I'm meeting up with my friend's husband and her friend and hanging out with them. Unfortunately I she has to work but it will be good to have someone to hang out with while I'm in Seoul. What I'm not looking forward to is the temperature. I'm going from consistent 90F to about 30F. Damn, that's going to suck.

Cambodia is amazing but I doubt I'll actually process everything I've seen here until I spend sometime at home. Its certainly inspired me and I think may push me in a direction I never thought I would go, law, but we will see what happens. I already have a list of the organizations I'd like to work with someday. Its a start. I have a lot to think about on the way home.

I'll post from home with pictures!

Good-bye Phnom Penh

We leave Phnom Penh tomorrow, head up the river to Siem Reap, where Angkor Wat is, and spend our final days as a group playing tourists. A welcome change.

Traveling with a group is always challenging but this one is the most challenging yet. There is a clear clash of personalities and I'm actually looking forward to be on my way home (that never happens, though I guess if I knew I had time to travel on my own I wouldn't be so excited). Unfortunately its gotten in the way for some people, but groups are groups. They can suck sometimes. Which is why I try and avoid them as a general rule.

Cambodia has been amazing though, it has the best and the worst of the world and I have to say the scales tip towards the worst. The social problems, corruption, health concerns, and the unwillingness to deal with the incredibly powerful legacy of the KR. Its so much to process in fact, that I'll have to deal with it at home. There's just too much in a day here, meetings in the mornings, after lunch, until 6pm. You meet so many incredibly amazing, inspiring people dealing with such difficult issues in an even more difficult settings, its so inspiring but so overwhelming.

I'm really a fan of Phnom Penh, though I don't know if I could be here more than a few months at a time. I'd like to come and volunteer for a while, I have a running list of organizations and there are two here that I'm particularly interested in, DC-Cam and Cambodia Center for Human Rights.

Ok I'm tired but will update from Siem Reap. Today was a very long day and I still have to finish some homework and pack. We met with some returnees and it was incredibly depressing but I'll write about that another day.

We leave tomorrow at 6am on a boat and head up river for a few hours. I really hope that we don't get stuck in the mud.

Hell on Earth

Two days ago we went to the dump.

Its about 20min out from where we are, which is in the center of Phnom Penh.

A lay missionary from Japan, Yuki, gave us a tour since she works there distributing medicines and helps run the schools they have begun. The houses are worse then most of the slum houses I have seen before. Most I have seen in the past are made of tin and cardboard, these are made of mats and straw and tarps. There is no water, electricity, or plumbing. There is no sewage system, so you can use your imagination as to the sanitary state of the place. Water has to be bought, $1 for water in a place where they survive by scavenging the dump for recyclables, the average daily income doesn't even reach a dollar here.

The schools the missionaries have set up here try and reintegrate the children in to the general public school system. Having no source for education, they are even more behind in their schooling than usual, and these schools hope to bring them up to par. Considering that schools are distant and that they are also needed at home, who knows if they will be reintegrated into the system. The children are amazing and beautiful, hilarious with their pranks and they love to flirt with the camera. (I really have to figure out how to post pictures.) Diseases run rampant, TB, lice, skin diseases, and of course the ever present HIV/AIDS virus. While there, Yuki handed out medicine to a TB patient who was lying in one of the straw huts, and smearing the children with an antibiotic ointment on their multiple cuts and bruises.

The dump itself. Well you walk behind the ramshackle huts and encounter a wall of trash. No kidding, a wall. About 30-45 feet high. You walk, over the trash, to the main dumping area, and its something out of a sci-fi movie. They burn most of the trash, and so smoke is burning your eyes with a wind that's blowing ash and god knows what else into your eyes and mouth (I have found another use for Buffs, they make an excellent mask) and you can’t really see as everything is hazy. People are everywhere, collecting a shifting through trash to make a living. There are makeshift houses there too, on top of the trash itself. They look like aliens, covered head to toe in rags, shifting through bags of clothing, rotting food, plastics, everything you could imagine. It really is hell on earth. Burning fumes, the repulsive smell, the haze obscuring your vision. As the dump truck comes, people clamor over themselves to be the first to look through the heap. Everyone is there, children, men, and women. The kids play, riding their bicycles through the area, reminding you that children will be children anywhere.

It’s a horrible life, but it’s also a living so who am I to judge?

It’s hard to put into words what the dump is like. It stressed our whole group out. It made me angry; at myself, at our country, at the Cambodian government. I have trouble processing why I was born into a healthy, safe and supportive community and the people here were not. This place really does defy any sort of logic, any idea of justice. How does one decide who is deserving and who is not and who is it that makes those decisions anyways (If anyone)??? Screwed sense of humor I tell you.

Cambodia is full of these questions. And I’m not sure if there is an answer to why these children are going to spend their lives rummaging through trash and living with diseases while other aren't. Fate? Coincidence? Dumb luck? I guess it depends on your spiritual beliefs and since I don’t really have any, I’m in a bit of a hole here. How do you explain injustice when it’s a matter of circumstance? Blame the government, blame the policy, blame the international system that keeps people in a state of poverty and despair. Do you blame the drug companies that can but won’t provide treatment? Do you blame anyone at all?

An interesting example of this is the Little Sprouts program. Yesterday we visited the program, a Maryknoll program to house orphaned children with HIV/AIDS. This is the program I mentioned at the beginning of my journal, where I met with Kevin the first day I was here. The children were amazing, they look so healthy, chubby even and incredibly energetic. We played with them for about 2 hrs, running and playing with bubbles and it’s hard to believe these children are dying. Most were infected through their mother, and they are tiny for their age. A 5 year old looks like a 3 year old. The funding for their HIV/AIDS treatment comes primarily from the Clinton foundation, along with a host of other organizations. The catch is that they will only provide them until they are 18, and then we shall see what happens. Since the children before never got into their teens, it will be a challenge for organizations to raise and support HIV positive young adults and find work for them in a country where only 10% of university graduates are able to find a job.

Some drug companies use groups like this to test their new drugs, the company getting free testers and the patient’s free medical “care.” I have serious questions about ethics here; a little too guinea piggish here. They do that with sex workers, some of whom we have met and they report that although the companies provide drugs, they give no medical support beyond that nor inform patients of possible side or long term effects.

Ok enough of the depressing stories.

Still having an amazing time, Cambodia is both enchanting and a real bitter taste of the world and all its baggage. But I love it here :-)

Day 12

Time moves fast in Cambodia and have lots to say and little time to say it.

The first week here went by so quickly, as our professor had us on a heavy schedule from 8am-5pm everyday, but I'll touch on some of the things we did.

After visiting the Killing Fields, we moved onto Toul Sleng, the former high school turned prison, where 20,000 people were tortured for confessions and sometimes beaten to death. Its a lot like going to Dachau, the photos staring out at you. It was extremely creepy to see that, I felt eyes running up and down me as I walked through those rooms and it was incredibly uncomfortable.
So that was our introduction to Cambodia and it was incredibly depressing.

Moving on to issues facing civil society today, our second day was fascinating. We started at the Documentation Center of Cambodia, DC Cam, an organization working to preserve the history of the Khmer Rouge era through interviews, films and confessions. The work they do there is amazing, gathering testimony from people from all areas of the country, victims and perpetrators alike. Some of the testimony collected will be used in the upcoming Tribunal (the ECCC) and for educational purposes. Its difficult to believe, but many of Cambodia's younger generation doubt the existence of the genocide. There is no curriculum in school addressing the Khmer Rouge era, and so children grow up hearing the stories of their parents but they don't believe them. This is a huge issue facing Cambodia as it tries to have an open discussion about the genocide with the upcoming trials. DC Cam is working to develop a curriculum on how Khmer did in fact kill other Khmer and to preserve the history of the genocide. They have begun outreaching with education field trips to places like the killing fields and Toul Sleng, but many people in Cambodia still live in rural areas and so access is not what it could be. DC Cam also does a bit of film, and we watched a film documenting the history of a woman who was raped and escaped. Very few of the survivors are rape victims as rapes usually occurred right before the executions and very few survived.

Following that we went to the Extraordinary Chambers of the Court of Cambodia, (ECCC) which is the UN back tribunal set to begin in June 2007. Trying the top 7 remaining members of the Khmer Rouge (KR) era, this court hopes to provide some sort of justice and closure for Cambodia and its KR history. The difficulty will be the active engagement of the Cambodian people. Centered in Phnom Penh, the trials are far removed from most of the population and due to difficult communication links of radio and TV, not everyone will have access to the court proceedings as they happen. We met with Marcel Lemonde (I think that was his last name) the international co-investigating judge who ran down for us the aims of the tribunal and the hope that it will provide a sense of closure and justice for the Cambodian people.

One of the most interesting meetings we had last week was with Women's Agenda for Change, a rather radical group of feminists working with garment and sex workers to address the rising HIV /AIDS rates, pay scales, abuse and security. Sex work in Cambodia is not illegal, nor is it really legal. Sex work is also usually the last resort, most women came from rural area to find work, and after stints in other industries are forced to work in the sex industry. The women we spoke with talked about the difficult working conditions, with unsanitary houses and neighborhoods, a lack of security due to gang violence and police harassment. A Cambodian sex worker can make from 3000-5000 riels per customer, that's about $0.75-$1.25. Condoms are expensive, about 5000 riels for a packet, and although many organizations work to provide them free to sex workers, the outreach is limited and not always accessible to everyone. They used to be a bit easier to get, but with the incoming Bush administration in 2001, the "God policy"was instituted and now USAID will no longer fund organizations that work to promote condom use education because its pushing an abstinence line.

Garment workers face similar issues though can have a better time depending on the factory they work with. We met with a group of 25 women, and one man, at a safe drop in house run by Women's Agenda for Change. If their factories knew they had gone to talk to us, they would have been fired, but come they did. They said that if even someone would hear the it was worth it. Conditions vary, but for the most part they reported dismal conditions. Unsanitary working spaces, not getting their pay, difficulty living off their wages, harassment by police when walking come late at night, health issues from working at the factory, all of these were issues that came up. It was a moving experience, made very difficult because they kept wanting to know what we were going to do to change this. I felt like an ass really, I had nothing to say to them except watch where we buy our clothes from but that seemed like such a pitiful answer after their incredibly moving stories.

The safe house was in the area where garment workers live, and sewage littered the place. During our discussion, sulphur kept drifting up my nostrils, it was nauseating. Most people keep an outdoor stove over a fire. We also visited a factory, one of the best of course. It was really nice actually. Sanitary, a childcare center, and a well stocked medical facility. I have photos to post that will show what it really looks like.

Another thing I'd like to mention is the rather blatant and disgusting prevalence of pedophilia. You see fat, disgusting western men with children, encouraging them to rub their feet, they buy them drinks, and are overly affectionate with them in a way that's just repulsive. Unfortunately, Cambodia has a serious problem with underage brothels. We were at the beach Sunday and men were surrounded by children, the children massaging them and sitting on their laps. Ugh.

There are some great legacies of colonialism, such as baguettes in the mornings and pastry shops and bakeries. I think I am finally getting used to the heat, as last night I actually got cold and turned off the AC. Its dropped from the low 90s to the mid 80s and the days actually feel quite comfortable. I also had a run in with a moto yesterday. All I heard was a loud THWACK and there I was, left in the middle of the street in a bit of a daze. The guy razed my left side and I have a neat bruise on my arm. :-)

I'm looking forward to tomorrow as we are going to the dump. :-D

Night!

Memorials

From an email to B:


The Killing Fields.


Its disturbing. The peacefulness of the setting, a former orchard with a little lake behind it. Trees, benches for enjoying the shade, chirping birds, and butterflies everywhere. And then as you walk, you look down and see a tooth by your feet.


When you enter the outdoor museum, you are first faced with a huge sanctuary, where they house 8000 skulls that have been recovered from the surrounding fields. They are listed by age, the first tier being primarily female ages 15-20. The tiers go up for about two stories, skulls upon skulls layered like a cake. It smells............musty. Kinda sour. I can't describe it. It took me a while to decide if I was going to take any photos, seems rather crass, but in the end I did. Its just that you may hear 8000 but *seeing* 8000 is so different. It makes it real in a way that you can't through words. I guess a picture really is worth a 1000 words.


From there you move out into the fields themselves, surprising small. There are little huts marking the major mass grave sites. There ranged from 115-450 bodies in each one. They are extremely shallow, I have no idea how they put that many bodies into one.


As you walk on the dirt path you begin to notice strange pieces of cloth that look like they are growing out of the ground. Its the bodies and clothing that have not been unearthed, and you realize your walking on top of them. And then you see the outline of a straight white line, its bone. Its small. An arm? A child's leg? Do you really want to know?


And then the teeth. That's what really got to me. Next to that small stump are two browned, intact teeth. From someone. Someone that you may be walking on. The rains come and each time bring up more and more of them. And now they are everywhere, making their presence known, they are still there.


There's this big beautiful tree. Knotted with layers of roots and shading an immense area. When they killed the younger children, they did it by taking them by the feet and whacking their heads against the truck.


Breathe. I had to remind myself to breathe.


An estimated 20,000 people were executed at the Killing Fields of Choeung Ek, and 9000 have been recovered. The ground it pitted with smaller, shallow, bowls. They are also graves, though smaller and roll like mini hills connecting the mass gravesites.


I felt like I was violating their space. You don't even realize it until about half way through that you area walking on them, that their clothes are being trampled under hundreds of feet per week. Its so bizarre, I really don't know how to explain what that feels like, I can only describe what it looks like.

Later on we went to Toul Sleng (S-21 Prison). The prison from where most of the people executed in the killing fields were taken.


But I'll have to save that for another day. I've had enough for one day.

Day Two

So I guess I clicked the wrong button in in the previous post and it didn't get posted till today. I was guessing, everything was in Korean :-)

I'm not able to get a Cambodian phone number due to red tape here but will keep working on it. I'll try doing it the Balkan way. And next time remind me to make my own stamp and to bring lots of red ink. :-)

Here's an excerpt from an email to B:

Cambodia is hot and humid. (I know stating the obvious)

You know, I always thought myself a rather savvy traveller but once again I am reminded that I'm really not. :-) Its definitely the poorest place I've been to and certainly the least developed. I'm in the capital and it doesn't have many paved roads, mostly dirt track. Luckily for us we are here in the dry season, as apparently when it rains its not uncommon to have to wade through ankle-calf deep sewage to get around.

From the plane, Phonom Penh looks like its in a flat, broad plain, with hills out in the distance. Its at the confluence of three rivers, which luckily for me, brings a consistent breeze and helps keep a bit of heat off.

The city is a combination of ruinous french era colonial buildings and the attempts of the post Khmer rouge era to build new housing, which has failed. The NGO crowd is incredibly strong here, they are really the only westerns here, very few of the backpackers I saw in Thailand bound for the tourist sights. Apparently, we are staying in NGO land as well, close to UNESCO, the UN, World Bank, and dozens of independent organizations. The issues facing Cambodia are stark and seemingly endless.

We went yesterday to meet with a Marinol (spelling?) group that works with children who are HIV Positive, ages 2-14. They have all been orphaned, and until about 2 years ago, never reached their teens. The problems facing these groups are enormous as what do you do with 800 children once they are older? Bill Clinton apparently pledged to provide the meds for these kids until age 14 but how does a society much less an organization support them, both physically and socially beyond that?

Today we spent the morning at a fair to celebrate UN Human Rights day, and I got to see the type of works various groups work with. The amount of groups, plus the fact that they are all dealing with a range of issues is amazing. Lets make a small list; anti-corruption, sex workers, HIV/Aids, children's groups, poverty alleviation, farmers rights, trade unions, garment industry workers, refugees, the arts, reconciliation, UN tribunal, under age brothels and a ton of others. It amazing really.

When I spoke with Kevin from the Marinol group yesterday, he talked about how the Khmer Rouge Era touched everything and everyone. 90% of the artists we killed, 80% of the academics, they left nothing. People here are rebuilding from scratch. Trying to revive everything from basic social traditions, like dance and song traditions to the economy. Bosnia is farther along in its redevelopment from what I can tell and their war ended 10 years ago. The Khmer Rouge was overthrown in 1979.

The other amazing this is that apparently the non-profit crowd is making bank here. Some people are making in the 6 digits to be working here, and that seems so incredibly ridiculous to me. And anyone can come, so you have a hodge podge of organizations, from well funded legit ones to crazies who decided they want to move here and set up an NGO for whatever reasons. Not to say they people shouldn't be allowed, it just creates a bit of havoc you know.

I am excited to meet with the ones we have lined up for the class, we may even get to go to the dump and meet with people there who are working there! The orgs range from sex workers, to HIV/Aids to refugee and I don't know what else. Since I got here early, I've been hanging out with Tracy, our prof, and making the rounds meeting with some of the people we are going to meet later this week.

What else? The US dollar is king here, everything is in dollars and the only time I've used the riel is to pay the moto and tuk tuk drivers. Even in the grocery store, where everything is posted in dollars. Apparently the grocery store is also the place to be to change money, I heard most of the NGO folks get paid in $100 bills and head straight to the grocery to change them into smaller denominations. I was also wrong about there being no ATMs in Cambodia, there are now four in various parts of the city. :-)

Traffic is typical from what I remember in China, but far fewer cars. Crowded by moto drivers, tuk-tuks (a tuk-tuk is a moto hauled 4 person cart thing) and the occasional Lexus SUV (!!) and smaller sedans, all of them yelling at the same time. One thing I forgot about Asia is the lack of personal space in public spaces. I had a tiny thing about half my size nearly knock me over when I was trying (shouldn't have bothered) to line up to get a ticket stamped.

Tracy said that you fall into two categories after visiting Cambodia, you either love it or hate it. I'm pretty sure I'm going to love it :-) There's something refreshing about driving up a dirt potholed street with the whiffs of sulphur and trash assaulting your nostrils. :-)

Hope all is well @ home and the various other places you are!! (Esp you Mailians and Ethiopians!)

Love you all,
Natalia

I HATE turbulence

I have a couple of hours before I leave for Bangkok. Bumpy rides are uncomfortable, esp over Vancouver Island. Go Figure.

Anyways, I have sometime to kill here in Seoul as I wait for my flight out. I'm running on about 3hrs of sleep and some pasta, I think when I finally get to Cambodia I'm going to crash pretty hard. :-)

Actually, I think I'm going to stake myself out a piece of the carpet over there and crash right now. *snore*

BTW Korean Airlines rocks. Good food, good moies, good service.

PS I don't have cell service and will text when I get some. Hopefully in Bangkok.

Here we go!

WOO HOO!!!!

And I'm off!! Well nearly, my plane pleaves at 1:15pm. I fly Seattle-Seoul, Seoul-Bangkok on Korean Air, Bankok-Phenom Penh on Thai Airlines. Total Flight time: 20hrs, total travel time: 30hrs. Yuck.

I tried to get my UK phone number on but apprently I waited too long to top up and my number has expired. Bummer. So you guys can text me for now on my regular US number and I'll post my Cambodian number when I buy my SIM card.

Ok. Deep breath. I hate flying. Especially over oceans.

10 days to go

Off for my newest adventure! 10 days and counting until I fly over the great Pacific to a small war torn country with a brutal history (hmmm...sounds like most of my travels. Whats up with that!)

My biggest concern right now? Getting my graduate applications in so that when I come back I'll have something to look forward to!

Ok back to personal statements. Will update prolly as I'm madly throwing everything into a bag for my trip.